Name: Rose Hypnol
Number: s6
Position You Play: on 8 wheels
Injuries: Bruised ego when black death took victory in our private bout
Distinguishing Feature(s): trash talking big mouth with added Essex twang
Theme Song: ‘The Gauntlet’ - Dropkick Murphys
Height: Tranny tall (on skates)
Blood Type: Clear – like Stolichnaya
Age: approaching my peak
Birthday: The deepest depths of winter (January 3rd)
Sign: The bird
Status: Taken
Hometown: Of White Shoes and Roman ruins
Occupation: You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.
Loves: Road trips, Being mardy, A fresh pack of Luckies, a chilled bottle of White, shooting my big mouth off, tight jeans, tattooed men,(but never tight jeans ON tattooed men) John Cusack, muscle cars and vices.
Despises: The super keen, non derby believers
Awards and Good Behaviour: What’s good behaviour? ;)
Penalties, Feuds, and General Bad Behaviour: Never been caught!
Favourite Food or Drink: No food with a face
Favourite Quote: If you have a vagina and an attitude in this town, then that’s a lethal combination - Sharon Stone
Favourite Movie: smoky and the bandit & anything where the bitch wins out
Favourite Songs: Ruby Soho – rancid, anything by the Pogues, the Ramones or the Clash. Johnny Cash, Uncle Leon & the Alibis, Brian Wilson,

Name: el VISIOUS
Number: 138
Position You Play: vocals
Injuries: nope
Distinguishing Feature(s): beauty
Theme Song: Trouble- Elvis
Height: 5.4
Blood Type: not bad
Age: 23
Birthday: 10/08/83
Sign: the Lion
Sexual Preference: what ever i can get
Hometown: the smog
Occupation: fountain of knowledge
Loves: advocardo’s
Despises: mushrooms
Awards and Good Behavior: i dish them out in stickers
Penalties, Feuds, and General Bad Behavior: not a fan of detentions… bring back corporal punishment
Favourite Quote: its only rock n roll
Favourite Movie: i like to perv over christopher walken

Since their first training session in April 2006 when Roller Derby was initially introduced to the UK, the London Rollergirls have been training hard to get this unique, grass-roots sport off the ground.

After much blood, sweat and yes, even some tears, the London Rollergirls are now ready to unleash this amazing sport onto the unsuspecting public of London and are happy to announce that their inaugural public exposition “THE GREAT ROCK ‘N’ ROLLERDERBY SWINDLE� will be taking place in the early evening of Saturday 8th September.

The Doors will open at Tottenham Green Leisure Centre (1 Philip Lane, Tottenham, N15 4JA) at 4pm, with bouting to commence at 5pm. As with all roller derby bouts, there will be music, half time entertainment; provided by the fabulous Actionettes, and of course some audience participation will be required. An afterparty to celebrate with the London Rollergirls will follow at the conclusion of the bout, the details of which will be available on the London Rollergirls website.

Tickets are £7 pre-sale, and available from the London Rollergirls, Wacky Haircutters (St Anne’s Court, Soho ph: 020 7494 3101), and Blood Brothers Tattoo (Holloway Rd – ph: 0207 619 0345). A limited number of tickets will be available at the door only if the event doesn’t sell out in advance. Please contact the London Rollergirls via their website www.londonrollergirls.com, MySpace www.myspace.com/londonrollergirls, or email info@londonrollergirls.com for ticket details.

As it will be the first public exposition of roller derby in the UK, this is an exciting step forward for the sport, and the London Rollergirls hope you can make it!

Name: Bêtte Noir
Number: 73
Tagline: The bane of your existence
Position You Play: Pivot, Blocker, Jammer
Injuries: dislocated shoulder (surgery 12/06)
Distinguishing Features: big blue eyes, steel tipped feather duster

Bio:
With feather duster in hand, Bêtte Noir was first introduced to a world in which class meant something and the help were VERY helpful. The product of a stereotypical but still sordid encounter between a naughty French maid and young Master of the house, she took to her mother’s vocation like a fish to water.

At the tender age of five, the bastard child and her mother were banished to the barren concrete jungle of the London slums after the lady of the house noticed the family resemblance. Already a cocky and resilient young thing, Miss Noir vowed to return to her father’s manor and reclaim the fortune that should rightfully be hers.

Upon realising the distance she would have to travel, she began work on fashioning a pair of shoes that would last the long journey home. A flash of inspiration led to the creation of her first pair of roller skates, and on her 18 th birthday she kissed her mother goodbye and set out on a skate that was to change her life forever.

Exhausted, but with thighs of steel, she finally arrived at the place of her birth only to find her father a broken man and the family fortune long disappeared — along with his wife, the butler, and the stable boy.

To this day, Bêtte Noir is still looking for her family fortune, hunting down the woman that stole the life that should have been hers. She’s not yet sure what she’ll do when she finds her, but be assured it will be violent and bloody, and possibly involve a skate to the face.

The London Roller Girls played host to Stuttgart Valley Roller Girls over the last weekend of June, and spread some EU Derby love! We had Dolly Bust-her, Miss Tsunami, Carla Caputo and their coach RockDog representing the German arm of Roller Derby.

Things began on the Friday night at The Ship in Soho where many a beverage was consumed (possibly too many) and much merriment was made. It was brilliant to talk derby with people who are just as passionate about it as we are! Everyone immediately bonded, and we all couldn’t wait to train together the next day.

I think it would be fair to say we were all a bit nervous before we started. How would we measure up to the Germans? Would they completely annihilate us? Would our Derby bubble be burst?!?! But once skates were laced up, and helmets on, we all just soaked up being in the company of fellow skaters.

We also had Teflon Donna, a super kick ass skater from the Philly Roller Girls skating with us (and her lil sis from a new league in Virginia!), making it a truly international training session and scrimmage! Personally, I was bloody exhausted after the first drill - we line up fast to fastest, and the girl in front sprints as fast as she can for 2 laps then peels off - the pace gets faster and faster with each girl. Somehow I ended up at the back, and by the time 30+ girls had sprinted, followed by the super fast Stuttgart girls and Teflon Donna (whose dumb idea was that?!) it was all I could do to stay on my feet!! Those girls are FAST!!!

Stuttgart joined in all our drills, including Queen of the Track, where the aim is to be last girl standing. We had heard the rumours that the German girls were really hard blockers, so we were waiting to fly into walls left right and centre. But while they definitely enjoy a tough body check, they were eliminated due to some well placed hits and some tough penalty reffing from the LRG enforcer crew, so the winner was our very own wily minx Poison Arrow!

Onto the scrimmage on Saturday 30th, and my team had Dolly and Carla helping us out, while Miss Tsunami and Teflon Donna graced the other team. While I’m embarrassed to say my team lost by half, it was a hell of a lot of fun!!! Fast, Hard, Rough, and BRILLIANT!! Stuttgart were so much fun to scrimmage with! It was so exciting to have a whole new set of skills and talents injected into the scrimmage, and I think it really pumped us up to bout them in the future! Dolly was so sweet and gave me a big hug afterwards!!!

Hopefully we will see them again very soon, in Stuttgart next time! A big thanks to SVRG and our American derby sisters for coming out and playing with us! We had such a great time, and we will kick your butts very soon on the track, I promise! ;)

Meow
Kitty DeCapitate

LRG FIRST PRIVATE BOUT

Better late then never, here’s the photos from our first private (closed doors) bout. And not that I need to mention it for a third time but this was a non public event and just for us. BUT… we are putting plans together for our public bout as I type! We will surely let you know…

“surely”… who talks like that?

anyhow here’s the photos… click your mouse finger here!